I tried pretending nothing was wrong. And I sympathize.I wish I had easy answers for you. We have had to go on lock down 3 times since November! Even with no worries and no stress (aside from these Goddamn taxes, Long Live the Queen, wake up America), I still can’t shake the fact that no matter all the beauty and wonder I’ve seen in this world, that it somehow gets better by doing the same boring shit over and over? If so, I HIGHLY suggest calling there and speaking to someone! Every person in this world processes and handles situations differently, and I do not say any of this to mean that you don’t necessarily understand a bit of what others may feel or to belittle what you went through but someone who went through the exact same thing as you will not handle it in the exact same way and therefore you don’t know exactly what they are going through.I’ve been dealing with depression for a very long time, counseling eases it but it doesn’t help and neither does hearing others stories. (I’m not quite finished writing it yet! I don’t have any friends so I don’t need to call any of them. I’m tired of crying.
I wanted to jump infront of a train but apparently that doesn’t easily kill you. The first one was when I was a child. I just feel so lost and aggravated. I managed to finish my bachelor degree but I feel I didn’t learn a thing. I subscribed to the list to receive that book that is making you cry a river… because YOU are a warrior to us, Lorraine, i truly admire your struggle to cope with your past & how you overcame every single moment of weakness, despite you stumbled sometimes… but you survived, you learnt & moved on… like that futuristic movie of Tom Cruise. I still want to continue and therefore, I’m here.
It’s all coming down on me at once. I finally went to our province’s normal university. Use brainstorming games like puzzles, switching boxes, tic-tac-toe, Sudoku, etc., to challenge your brain. Call that person and straightforwardly say, “I need your help.
)You are stronger than you think, than you give yourself credit for.Focus on the positive instead of the negative, if you can. Don’t see any life left in this thing. Aside from that, I tried occupying my time with small hobbies and also forced myself to leave the house whenever my friends wanted to see me. The first time I picked up a rusty knife I found in the back yard and tried to shove it into my stomach. And lately ges been forcing me to kiss him in the mouse. My mother and father are not relyable at all they never cared for me..forgot to tell you im 33 years old and all of my life was totaly alone. It will open up a whole new world for you. I’ve tried therapy and heard similar things, it doesn’t work for me.
And he slits his throat and dies. I don’t want to do this, but my thoughts are scaring me and it’s hard to control them.Sam, I know how you feel. You can also take classes in singing and dancing.
I just want to end it all. I dream about talking to psychologist but I don’t want to be nuisance to my parents. I am grasping for things to hold on to, so that I don’t fall into a hole in which I eventually won’t be able to climb out of, only to watch everyone from above mourning and acting like they care when it’s already too late.
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